So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
