i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
