At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
