tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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