I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
