Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
