Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Randomize
