i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Randomize
