I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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