I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
