: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
