and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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