I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
