Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
