if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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