Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize
