remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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