She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
