Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Randomize
