As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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