So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
