lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
