she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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