Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
