so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
