YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
