whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Bring me that man meat
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
