just tell him i said nine months
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
