know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
The struggles of a small town man whore
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
