I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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