so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
