I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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