Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
