Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
