just tell him i said nine months
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
