One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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