He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
