Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Randomize
