i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
