i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
