i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
