You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
