We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
