Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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