Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
