is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
