i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
