omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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