The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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