Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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