How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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