Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I enjoy the company of your penis
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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